Daily Silly Status

I wonder if angry people know about naps?

Some of the nicest women you`ll meet on Facebook are men.

I never meant to be so cold, I never meant to be so cold. - Mother nature

I get nervous after taking time off work, that in my absence my boss will realize how little I actually do at the office.

Married people always ask when you’re getting married like they get points for recruiting to their club of misery.

I`ve learned more from one season of "Shark tank", than I ever learned in four years of buisness school.

"I know im the best driver on the road" thinks every guy.

Always believe a woman when she says: “You don`t want to know!”

Hedgehogs would seem far less adorable if they had more relevant names like `Stabbyrabbit` or `Weaponrat`

Pro Tip: If you`re on the bus, and wearing headphones, people can still hear you fart.

I try to always be the bigger person by hanging out with a lot of short people.

If you needed to wear camouflage in a gingerbread house, would you wear ginger snaps?

I wish all these vegetarians would stop eating my food´s food!

Have you ever noticed that half way through the ColonialPenn insurance commercial, Alex Trebek tries to pull a Jedi-Mind-Trick on us.... "This is the insurance you are looking for." (I didn`t get enough sleep last night.)

Sometimes I do totally awesome and amazing things just to throw people off.