Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
LIFE TIP: The early worm gets dismembered, and eaten alive!
As a kid, i was afraid of the dark. Now as an adult, I love the dark because I am terrified of the electrical bill.
Nobody knows how much work I put into looking only this fat.
I just found out cock fighting is done with roosters and now it feels like this 6 months of training has been wasted.
I don’t understand how my house gets so messy when I literally sit in one spot with my phone all day.
Party like you will never be invited to another!
Admit it...Life yould be boring without me.
When I was a kid, I wanted to be an adult. So yeah...kids are stupid.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "Sir" without adding, "You`re making a scene."
I think instead of doing laundry I`m just going to buy a second hamper...
If I can`t convince you, I will sure as hell confuse you.
Keep it down kids!.. Daddy is trying to think of something stupid to say on the internet.
That awkward moment when you type your password where you should`ve typed your email, and your friend`s standing right there -___-
It takes me like three days to wake up in the morning.
I’m not always rude. Sometimes I’m sleeping.