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what does bgif mean on a friday night ? ... boobs go in front
I’m the kind of guy who dreams about naps while I’m asleep.
"F@ck It" has gotten me through a lot of situations.
feels like getting some work done ... so I am sitting down until the feeling passes.
I missed that one episode of The Walking Dead where they show us how the zombies keep everyone`s lawns so freshly mowed.
Rawwrrr means I love you in dinosaur. Everyone knows that, silly
I’ll stop being so lazy when being so lazy stops being so awesome.
The awkward moment when you set something down for a second and it disappears off the face of the earth.
Just saw a Christmas tree drive by with a Smart Car strapped to the bottom of it.
I kinda dig you, want to hang out and stuff until we hate each other?
I feel like I am losing my mind !!! But as long as I can keep the bit that tells me when to pee, I should be OK !!
Don`t get excited girls. That bulge in my pants is just emergency Oreos.
Nothing says I have faith in God like the bullet proof glass on the Pope`s car.
Life Insurance: Let me get this right. I pay you until I die, then someone ELSE gets the money?
Why don`t family members send me money for my birthday anymore? I need it now more than when I was 7