Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Hey ladies breastfeeding in public,...Why don`t you ever smile in my pictures?
one of the Olsen twins got married earlier today! when the fiance was asked "which one???" he replied "who cares???"
If you can`t remember my name, just say `donuts`. I`ll definitely turn around and look.
Burger King is offering delivery service in some areas. I don’t trust it. Everyone knows it’s impossible to drive without eating the fries.
Stop asking why I’m still single. I don’t ask how you’re still married.
It`s a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny jean fad.
A sheep walks into a bar. Lots more sheep follow, the barman counts them and falls asleep, the sheep help themselves to free drinks. Genius.
My greatest fear is that PMS is fake and this is my real personality.
Whoever said you can`t "like" your own status is just not awesome enough to do it.
Can you imagine how sexy I`d be if I ate right and took care of my body... I`m not going to, but can you imagine
It could be worse. Spiders could have wings.
If your buttcrack is showing out of your pants. I will drop change in it and make a wish.
I forget, how much tequila goes in mashed potatoes? Now that`s funny, I don`t care who you are. Oh, don`t copy that part. I mean this part. Oh hell!! Your going to copy and paste the whole thing anyway ;)
I`m not giving the kids a time out. I`m giving myself one. The thought of sitting in a corner & being ignored sounds just heavenly.
If your day was that bad, why do you assume we want to know about it?