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happy 3rd birthday to the tartar sauce in my fridge
More often than not, the excitement of a Facebook friend request dies upon discovering who it is.
Hmmmm, thats odd. . . .According to this height / weight chart. . . . I`m too short.
I retired from being my brothers keeper when I realised that I was letting in goals that wouldn`t have scored if his post was empty
Yesterday was international ninja day and I didn`t even know. Well played ninja day, well played.
My screensaver is a screenshot of a bunch of spreadsheets so my boss doesn’t notice when I haven’t moved my mouse in an hour.
I laughed more at the Broncos offense then I did at the commercials.
When I go through an automated car wash I close my eyes, because it`s easier to pretend I`m in a car that way.
I hate when I wake up in the middle of the night to get a quick drink of water and then accidentally eat a whole pizza and a cheesecake
You`ll never see me on Hoarders because I can`t afford that much sh!t.
I`m under the weather today, also so is everyone else, that`s how weather works.
Running shoes? No, I don`t run. These are my "better hurry up the liquor store is about to close" shoes.
Never underestimate the power of the web. -Charlotte
I have no idea how I used to look for things in the dark before I had a cellphone.
SAFETY TIP: Lock your doors and windows before bed. By the way, I love what you`ve done with the place.