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Your boyfriend has long hair too. I sometimes have trouble figuring out who the girl is in the relationship.
My neighbor came rudely banging at my door at 2:30 am, luckily for him I was up practicing on my new drums
Honestly, my biggest fear about becoming a zombie in the apocalypse is all the walking.
Guys...dont mess up and buy her the wrong brand of vacuum cleaner for Valentines Day this year. Spend a little extra for a really good one ... Just tring to help.
Life is short, break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably and never regret anything that made you smile ?
Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into our lives & make us wanna leave footprints on their face...
YouTube "This video is not available in your country". where the hell am I from? NARNIA?
According to my nipples, there is a 99% chance it`s cold as hell right now!
Anyone else has a plastic bag at home full of plastic bags?
I bet no one in Africa is allergic to gluten.
Sorry I missed your call. I was peeing and had both hands full.
Guys communicate by insulting each other, but don’t really mean it. Girls communicate by complimenting each other, but don’t really mean it.
How about this for lazy: I`m letting the NSA take all my selfies for me.
I like to finish other people’s sentences because my version is better.
If you love something, feed it so much that it get’s too fat for anyone else to want.