Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Women don`t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think.
I put ALL my eggs in one basket at the grocery store.... Today..!!
I can`t stand people who blame everyone else for their problems....I`d be successful and happy by now if it wasn`t for them!!!!
Deja poo. The feeling that you`ve heard this sh!t before.
Black Friday, because after a day of thankfully stuffing your face, you deserve a deal on purchases you don’t need.
Life is tough. It’s even tougher if you’re stupid.
I just read the words "untimely death" and thought, "Man, I hope my death is timely."
My downstairs neighbor thinks I`m a little creepy and that I overstep my bounds. At least that`s what she wrote in her diary.
If you want people to know where you stand, wear the same socks for a week
The best person to get thrown in jail with would have to be the Kool-Aid Man.
I`ll bet whoever said "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" had just farted
I`m starting a pay it backward campaign. When I get up to the drive through window I tell them that the car behind me is going to pay for it.
Well, well, well. Guess who the grocery store asked to come back soon.
I took two years of Spanish in high school, so ordering off the Taco Bell menu is super easy for me.
is wondering if the hokey pokey is really what it´s all about