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You can pretty much text anything as long as you put a happy face emoticon afterwards. You`re a slut :)
Iām gonna have to get new pets, Iām running out of passwords.
I replaced the spare tire in my car with a box of wine. I`ve no idea how to change a tire, & I bet I`ll need a drink as I wait for a ride.
Some idiots actually sold their homes and properties thinking the world was really going to end! What losers. I hope my boss gives me my job back on Monday
I bet aliens would visit us more if Will Smith didn`t punch them in the head as soon as they got here.
I`ve never said "in all seriousness" and actually meant it.
I`m just a boy...standing in front of a girl...asking her to lov.....aw who am I trying to fool. I just want in your pants.
Ya .... That Supermoon was OK ..... But I was quite disappointed when I realized it didn`t even have a cape.
What Flickering Lights Mean: 1% Electrical problems 99% demons and sh!t.
If the Dollar Store ever starts selling alcohol....drinks are on me.
There is 2 address we will always know by heart, 1: Our Own, and 2: P. Sherman 42 wallyby way Sydney!
Depression is wanting to lay down and realizing that you are already laying down.
Setting the alarm clock proves I`m capable of making the same mistake every day.
Facebook is like a nude beach. Everybody lets everything hang out, and you really don`t want to see a lot of it...
I remember when peer pressure was all about drugs and promiscuous sex. Now it`s Fitbit and who has the best gluten free recipes.