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The first rule of selfie club should be to clean your room.
I just can’t stop thinking of all the people who signed my yearbooks that I have let down by failing to “stay cool”
Aren`t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know...The birth of Santa
I’m quite confident that the reason I’m single is because I didn’t forward that chain letter in 2003.
Pretty much the only time I want to hear about your ex is if she`s standing behind me with a weapon, other than that I`m good.
Every novel is a mystery novel if you never finish it.
I’m so broke this New Years Im gonna party like its $19.99.
So far, I am 100% at believing what happened next on Facebook links.
When I`m in a good mood I act like I`m I`m in a bad mood so nobody approaches me and ruins my good mood.
I am bored. Anyone need anything avenged?
My participation in this meeting will be based solely on the snacks they provide.
Facebook is like a nude beach. Everybody lets everything hang out, and you really don`t want to see a lot of it...
Someone just asked me if I was `happily` married. Single people are adorable.
If you think this week was a drag, wait till you see what happens next week!
I used to think I was good at multi-tasking. Turns out it’s just my multiple personalities doing one task at a time.