Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
So far today has been a pretty good day...I haven`t had to bite or hit anyone, yet!!
It may look like I`m doing nothing, but I`m actively waiting for my problems to go away.
These old people at the bus stop really suck at paintball.
If I`ve learned anything from Facebook, it`s that you shouldn`t be learning on Facebook.
Ice cream is clearly God`s way of telling us he likes us a little bit chubby.
They used to be called "jumpolines" until you jumped on one...
Goodnight, good people - and nite nite to the naughty ones too!
Deja Vu: When God thinks something is so funny he has to rewind it to show it to his friends
Went shopping alone and the cashier asked, "How are you guys doing?" Now I`m 90% sure he can see ghosts and one is following me around.
When I count calories it involves a bunch of multiplication.
people say nobody`s perfect..i made nobody!..
Nice try blocked number, but I don`t even answer my phone when I know who`s calling.
My favorite part of seeing someone I know in public is pretending I didn’t.
Ever notice that no one ever has three cats? They either have one or two cats, then it jumps to 17.
If a dwarf smokes weed does he get high or medium?