Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

People will do odd things to get even.
iOS 8 let`s you passcode lock specific apps? It`s fun imagining how many break ups that will cause.
The larger the implants, the more likely she’ll be confused by a push/pull door.
Watching a movie with the girlfriend tonight. Can anyone recommend a good girlfriend?
I tried being awesome today, but I was just so tired from being awesome yesterday.
Nothing says "I dont take you seriously" like your dog wagging his tail when you`re yelling at him.
I`m not saying your house is haunted, but I think a ghost just ate all of your Gummy Bears while you were in the bathroom.
I’m not so much goofing off as impersonating upper management.
So far, I am 100% at believing what happened next on Facebook links.
My house is not messy. Those are just obstacles I`ve put in place for burglars.
According to Pinterest, I`m severely under-utilizing mason jars.
Here’s a joke for all you mind readers out there…
Walking out of a store after not buying anything and thinking, β€œtry not to act like a criminal, try not to act like a criminal”
For your final meal request to eat the electric chair and then the warden will be like well now what do we do he ate our electric chair
Here`s where I draw the line: ___________________________.