Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Lets face it we have all tried to get something done before the microwave timer goes off.
Two days is not enough time for a weekend.
I need to find a way to be asleep but still get all my work done.
My first mistake was thinking she couldn`t hit a moving target.
It only takes a second to show someone how you really feel about them... the cops call it indecent exposure, but whatever
Hang out with different people everyday so the only person who knows you`ve been wearing the same outfit all week is you.
Before asking a hot chick out, I wish I could first talk to the dude who`s sick of her bullsh!t.
The funny moment when a fat kid says "that`s how I roll".
Walmartians: Nothing says `FML` like these curious abominations of the shopping world.
I hate to be one of those who post cliffhangers but...
I`m under the weather today, also so is everyone else, that`s how weather works.
If there’s one thing that having kids will teach you, it’s home repair.
A spider just tried to crawl across my hand and now Googling how to extract a fork from bone without causing more damage.
If I ever go missing and there’s a big search party out looking for me, you can save time by not looking at any gyms.
Pink camouflage: I`m like, where you hiding? Candyland?