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Here`s an idea...You go away and I`ll stop ignoring you.
Why does the alphabet need to be in order anyway
When a woman says, "I`m NOT crazy" *clapping her palms together per syllable* That`s universal for, "You`re going to die."
If you have attention deficit disorder, throwing boomerangs isn`t for you.
Whoever invented self checkout greatly overestimated the general intelligence of the human race.
"what doesnt kill u makes u smaller" -mario Lol
If there was an award for most pessimistic, I probably wouldn’t even be nominated.
I`m an accident looking for a place to happen!
If your single and you know it…Pet your cat!
To do list- (1). Go to pet store. (2). Buy bird seeds. (3). Ask how long it will take for the birds to grow. (4). Wait for the reaction.
If I`m carrying a torch for you it`s only because I want to set you on fire.
Don`t ya wish you could hold people up to the light like a $20 bill to tell if they`re fake or real?
I don`t blame Monday. I blame Saturday for not matching my Powerball numbers
When your feeling down, I will be there to feel you up. ;)
Losing weight is not working for me, so I`m concentrating on getting taller.