Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Okay, calm down. Its a spider. Just one tiny litt- HOLY MOLY IT MOVED!
Is a roasted peanut like a regular peanut that was made fun of by celebrity peanuts?
I used to be a camera man in the porn industry but it became too hard...
I may have let you down, but it`s your fault for having such high hopes.
would a fly without wings be called a walk?
Facebook: Wasting peoples lives since 2004
The last time I saw something as ugly as your face I pinned a tail on it.
People who describe things as “better than sex” are having the wrong kind of sex.
Some people are like eye-candy... I`m more like eye-meatloaf.
I haven`t talked to my wife in three weeks. I didn`t want to interrupt her.
“Dad, I’m hungry.” “Hi, Hungry. I’m Dad.” - Every time.
"Iyam A. Wii Todd" <-- Bet you can say that name out loud, in a crowded place, and really fast!
Some people wonder why I never like or comment on their posts. It’s because I unfollowed you a long time ago.
I never used to mind my wife hitting me in the face as she climaxed until I found out she was faking it.
Great friends never let you do stupid things......alone