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There`s a difference between having a unique name and a common name that`s spelled wrong.
Women spend more time thinking about what men think than men actually spend thinking.
Whoever has my voodoo doll, please scratch between my butt cheeks..I`m in public.
My kids don`t even know they have a grandma that gives them $100 on their birthdays
Never , under any circumstances , take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. O_o
My friend on Facebook "Can`t believe its Monday again already"... if only there were some way for her to calculate the order in which days occur.
The word “fireplace” really reveals the creativity of our ancestors
Is it bad that "WINE" is always on my grocery list? At the top? In all caps?
Facebook needs a "slap a b!tch button"
Regardless of how much time you think you waste, just know that someone created a very detailed Wikipedia page for Grumpy Cat.
You`re either part of the solution, or you`re one of my coworkers.
I`m Not Single. I am romantically challenged
Well, it`s almost the end of the year. No point in trying to become a good person this late in the game.
I`m a nonviolent person until I see a spider. Then I turn into Al Capone and "I want him DEAD! I want his family DEAD! I want his house burned to the GROUND!
It would be so cool to be able to see an album of all the pictures you’ve accidentally photobombed in public.