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I wanna see Mythbusters do the bible.
Apparently, the answer "I Know" is not a good answer when your friend tells you how good his girlfriend is in bed
Anything is possible when you have no clue what you`re talking about
If you replace the "W" in "where" "what" and "when" with "T" you get answers to the questions.
* feels winds of change * realizes it`s just a hole in my shorts
$5.99 Trojan condoms or $19.99 Huggies diapers. Choose wisely...
All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or married.
Why do I even have unlimited texting?
If Kanye didn`t sing "Gold Digger" while Kim walked down the aisle, I`m not interested in hearing anything about their wedding.
Chaos, panic and disorder. My work here is done.
My wife told me to strive for perfection, so I divorced her and started dating a swimsuit model.
From what I can piece together, this Pitbull character enjoys "partying"
My Facebook account would benefit from a breathalyzer-activated password.
You can tell Charles Manson really loves his fiancee by the way he hasn`t murdered her
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.