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Apparently getting injured while in the KISS Army doesn`t make you eligible for V.A. benefits.
You`d think my boss would know me by now and stop asking me everyday if I`ve been drinking.
Boss: You`re on another break already? Me: No. This is the same one you saw me on an hour ago.
OK. If you`re so smart, what`s the answer to this question?
Warning!! Today I will be coloring OUTSIDE the lines..
I watched the deleted scenes from a porno last night. Turns out he ended up fixing the washing machine after all.
Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes that reason is that you’re a terrible person and had it coming.
I may be delusional but at least I`m going to Mars in November.
When will math grow up and start solving its own problems
that awkward moment when a bug or fly lands on your computer screen in your first reaction is to scare it away with the cursor.
I`m CDO. It`s like OCD but the letters are in alphabetical order. LIKE THEY SHOULD BE!!!
No one has ever been in an empty room.
I rather be a known drunk, than an Anonimous Alcoholic
if sexyness, kindness, sweetness was a crime, You would be the world`s most wanted
Laughing at your mistakes can lengthen your life. Laughing at your wife’s can shorten it