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The story of George Washington chopping down the cherry tree is my favorite tale of honesty, integrity, and giving a child an ax
People don`t want the ugly truth, they would prefer a beautiful lie.
If the Terminator was female the line would have been, “I might be back, I haven’t decided yet.”
Note to self: Next time, don`t use "continue" as the Safe Word.
You can learn a lot from a person especially when you watch them through high powered binoculars, I`m just saying.
There has to be an online course that I can take to get over my internet addiction.
God made men. But sandwiches weren`t going to make themselves. So God made women.
Currently helping my son look for his chocolate that I ate last night.
Bars are Weird Its the only Business that kicks you out for buying TOO much of their Product
Don`t judge me just because I sin differently from you.
I always take life with a grain of salt, plus a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila.
It`s so strange to think that before Facebook all of this nonsense just stayed in people`s heads
Learn to fight like you`re the third monkey trying to get on the Ark!
I think it’s funny when dogs hide under the bed when they’re scared. I’m like “you idiot, that’s the first place monsters go!
Actions speak louder than words, unless those words are spoken by a drunken woman.