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There is a fine line between a numerator and a denominator
Hey ladies breastfeeding in public,...Why don`t you ever smile in my pictures?
Debt doesn`t buy happiness either.
So far my Christmas shopping has involved buying myself presents, so I’d say it’s been a success.
The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.
Got bored today so I dressed up in tan pants and a blue shirt then went into Best Buy and quit.
Awkward moment when you don’t know if you were offered gum out of generosity or if your breath stinks.
Eat whatever you want,and if anyone tries to lecture you about your weight ...Eat them too..!
Ladies, if he calls you crazy, don`t get upset. Crazy girls are better in bed so take it as a compliment. But stab him, just in case...
Drinking coffee is a fun way to become dependent on paying money to wake up.
If Mary Poppins floated in on an umbrella today, they`d shoot her out of the sky with a drone.
I am there for you no matter what, anytime, day or night, unless there is something good on TV or I am eating pie
I`ll be back in five minutes. If I`m not, read this again :D
So apparently airport security doesn`t like it when you call shotgun before boarding a plane.
The Spanish version of the Subway jingle “65.63 Peso 0.3 meter largo” isn’t quite as catchy…