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I don`t smoke,i don`t drink,don`t do drugs. I only have one small problem, i lie.
Hard work never killed anyone but why risk it?
Got suspended from Instagram for going on everyone`s food pics and posting the calories.
Now that Microsoft`s Steve Ballmer has bought the Clippers, I wonder if he will release a new version every few years that we all hate.
Don`t give me a sec, give me lots of secs.
How much do those guys who yell in the back of rap songs make? I could totally do that.
Why was the cat in the bag in the first place?
Dear YouTube, I will always “Skip this ad.”
I hate it when people like their own statuses * At this point you like your status for dramatic effect*
Life`s too short for Salad..............
Today is a great day. The mailman just delivered me an Iron Maiden cassette, which finally fulfills my Columbia House commitment.
It`s such a beautiful day I had to open the window while I watched TV
Don`t get out of bed, it`s a trap.
The first guy who made fire by rubbing two sticks together probably did a lot of other weird sh!t.
Little known fact: Walt Disney was the inventor of modern day text talk "M - I - C... C u real soon... K - E - Y... Y? Because we like u"