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My train of thought likes to circle around the station a few times, take some wrong turns, and end up totally lost.
I`m an organ donor, but I`m pretty sure all they`re going to use my liver for is "after" photos.
Remember when there was more important crap to do besides Facebook all day? Me neither.
I have been tagged and poked so many times today, I may not be able to walk tomorrow.
May the bridges I burn light the way.
Don`t waste your time being difficult. Put forth a little more effort and be impossible.
Can I have your number or do you just want the 8 dollars for the drink?
I finally found a simple and easy way to deal with my weight problem. I threw my scale out.
I got so drunk last night I tried picking up every woman in the bar and now my back is killing me!
You`re the reason I wake up everyday. Just kidding I have a job.
Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
Tried to borrow some bread from my Indian neighbour, but he said he had naan....
If the Sahara Desert had a motto it would be "Long time, no sea."
I try not to limit my madness to March.
According to my childhood, 1 out of 3 pigs are excellent builders.