Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
So when a couple gets engaged on Facebook for April Fools it`s okay to comment "hahaha" but the rest of the year it`s rude??
Stop bitchin about the frigid winter snow. There are kids in Africa who don`t even HAVE weather!
That awkward moment when you get in the van... And there`s no candy.
They say if the palm of your hand itches, you`re going to get something. And if your crouch itches, you`ve already got it.
I would like to congratulate my ex`s new boyfriend on giving up blow jobs.
Don`t ask me stupid questions and I won`t hurt your stupid feelings.
I know money talks but I wish mine had a better vocabulary instead of just ‘Spend me’.
I`m worried that my guardian angel is a crack head.
I got the girl to hysterically laugh today just by asking her out for a date.
Sometimes I wrestle with my demons. Other times we just snuggle.
Reason number 347 why I hate Facebook: A guy from high school posted 11 new photos all with the caption "me"
Every conversation should come with a snooze button. That way if you`re being too boring, I can push a button and keep you from talking for the next 10 minutes.
Spruce up your weeknight: run the dishwasher and imagine you`re on a cruise!
You guys make me wanna be a better alcoholic!
A roman walks into a bar. He holds up two fingers and says "Five beers please."