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As long as everything is exactly the way I want it. I am totally fleible.
My business card is just a label I peeled off a beer bottle.
I have the rest of my life to be an adult.
Don`t ask me stupid questions and I won`t hurt your stupid feelings.
I`m doing the KFC Bucket Challenge!
There’s plenty of fish in the sea… I just suck at fishing.
I know I`m an adult now, but I still hold out hope that money will fall out of every card I get.
Never trust a man wearing more than 0 necklaces.
This beer is making me awesome !! ;)
I just threw up my weekend.
Somewhere the inventor of yoga pants is near death from all the high fives and non-stop free tequila shots he gets.
I lifted my hands up in the air and waved them like I just didn`t care.....Ceiling fan: 6 Me: 0
Pizza doesn’t ask questions. Pizza understands.
To help reduce cost, this status was typed in china.
Friends are like boobs. Some are real, some are fake