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whats the difference between a dog and a fox????? six shots
Life was much simpler when we could play a friendly game of Red Rover and just clothesline the people we didn’t like.
Sh!t`s spiraling out of control and I`m all like "wheeeee."
It’s impressive how quickly I can go from full to starving.
Congrats on your secret admirer! Must be nice having someone who’s ashamed to admit they like you!
You can tell yourself that Sesame Street is educational but Cookie Monster has lived there for like 40 years and still can’t conjugate verbs.
Oh, you have a brand new boyfriend? Please tell me more about how you think he`s `the one`.
Buying a smart car seems like a good idea until you hit a squirrel and flip over a few times.
Dimples are considered a facial muscledeformity in the medical world.
Do you women realize how silly you all look with your clothes on?
This is not the status message you are looking for .... Move along
My ex said he would die for me. All I`m saying is, it was his suggestion.
Beer: The WD40 for conversations.
I was driving thru Farmville and I had to pee ... so I pulled over and fertilized your crops
I`ve got worms !!!! ......... worms in me garden