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No thanks, alcohol free mouthwash, my life is depressing enough.
I just found out people are playing golf online. And I thought my life sucked!
Sure, Men love funny women. As long as they are pretty...and skinny...and they have a great pair of knockers!!
Everyone has a right to their own opinion, no matter how wrong they are. And that`s why we have a problem.
The problem with working from home is the absence of sexual harassment.
Nothing screams DUI like wearing a really nice suit on a city bus.
If the shoe fits, wear it. Unless they`re not yours. But you can still were them. It`s just a road test, after all.
Pretty nice opinion you got there. It`d be a shame if someone were to...not give a sh*t about it
I totally understand how batteries feel because I`m never included in things either
Found out the name of my neighbor`s cat. In other news, I now have free internet.
I miss being in a relationship. Could 1 of you girls come over here and yell at me, treat me like shi t and not sleep with me? It might help.
When you leave store without buying anything and all you can think is `keep calm, you`re innocent`.
The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.
Men think us women dream of finding the perfect man when really, all we want is to eat anything without getting fat.
Relationship status: Just got screamed at for peeling the carrots wrong.