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There are 2 types of people that annoy me: Drunk people, when I`m sober. Sober people, when I`m drunk.
Men use love to get sex...women use sex to get love...I use coupons to get pizza!
I don`t always agree with everything I say. :)
I see your arguement contains a lot of swear words, you must really know what you`re talking about
"I can`t wait to nail you later" *whispers to the new picture I just bought*
If a girl bangs ten dudes in a year she is a slut. If a guy done he`s gay. Definitely gay.
Have you seen that new golf ball that will automatically go in the hole if it comes within 4in of it. DO NOT carry it in your back pocket!
Don’t you hate when the whole bus is empty, but some guy sits right next to you? I know you do. That’s why I do it.
I know karate, jujitsu, judo, taekwondo and 28 other dangerous words. Still wanna` mess with me?
Things you need to know about me: 1- I`m lazy 2- hmm, one is enough
If anyone ever steals my identity, I hope they show it a good time. Take it skydiving. We`ve always wanted to go skydiving.
If a gay guy doesn`t write a book called "Fifty Shades of Haaaaaayyy" I`ll be disappointed.
My daughter asked me why I carry a gun inside the house. I told her I was scared of the CIA. She laughed. I laughed. Amazon Echo laughed.
I don`t mean to brag, but my posts are enjoyed by well over 20 people worldwide...
My wife can suffer in silence louder than anyone I know.