Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m always surprised how quickly "you`re so funny" turns into "everything is a fcuking joke to you." (usually about 3 months)
Half the journey is knowing where you’re parked.
Why don`t prison inmates just use liquid soap?
Nothing says “I don’t take you seriously” like your dog wagging his tail when you are yelling at him.
I wasn`t planning on giving Christmas gifts this year until I heard about those exploding Samsung G7 Note phones.
I’m considering becoming a mind reader ... What are your thoughts?
I followed my heart...Now I`m at the liquor store.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought, "Yep, you have a person in your basement."?
If you come to myspace and twitter about my yahoo, can I google over your facebook?
Some psychologists say that sleeping naked can help boost a person`s confidence, but nobody in this park seems to appreciate it.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "Sir" without adding, "You`re making a scene."
If my house is clean, it means that Facebook is not working.
I went on two diets because there wasn’t enough food on just the one.
I’m off for a quiet beer. Followed by fourteen noisy ones.
Did you ever wonder why the cat was in the bag in the first place?