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I haven`t been drinking. I know what day it is. I didn`t lose my pants. This might be my car. I know how to drive. -Lies I`ve told to cops.
Currently in the planning stages for a hangover.
Today I found a penny. It reminded me of you. Worthless & found in everybody`s pants.
There are times, when I actually am hungry like the wolf. But thanks to Duran Duran I can`t tell anyone without sound like a complete f*cking idiot
There is a method to my madness….and as soon as I figure out what the hell it is, I’m gonna be friggin’ unstoppable
Some of us are basically unpaid Facebook interns.
No, I don`t have tourette syndrome..I was just telling you what I think of you.
I just did a bunch of crunches and curls. There were Nestle Crunches and cheese curls, but still. I`m exhausted.
If I can`t convince you, I will sure as hell confuse you.
When you turn 21, you can legally do all the things you`ve been doing since you were 15.
people say nobody`s perfect..i made nobody!..
I swear, its like EVERY payday I gotta spend money cause there`s a birthday party to go to, a wedding, a baby shower, a new video game, a new stripper, something. Always something...
If by time, you mean vodka, then yes, time does heal all wounds.
Nothing in the world is more expensive than a girl who`s free for the weekend.