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I just found out that checking your credit score actually LOWERS your credit rating. Seriously? That`s like every time you look in the mirror, you get a little bit uglier.
We live in a world in where it is easier to get out of a marriage than a mobile-phone contract
Instead of exes, they should be called whys.
Watching movies alone sucks. There´s no one to ask, "What did he just say? Who is that guy?"
My pessimism has never failed me, but I`m sure someday it will.
What if in like 30 years they made a film about Leonardo DiCraprio and how he never won an Oscar…and the actor who played him got an Oscar.
If the shoe fits, wear it. Unless they`re not yours. But you can still were them. It`s just a road test, after all.
My talent is being wasted, if that counts as a talent.
Since you no longer have a calendar I`d like to notify all the Mayans that it has been one year since the end of the world.
I finally got some medication for my Attention Deficit Disorder. Now if I could just remember the name of it and where I left it at.
I love sleep because its like a time machine to breakfast.
Why do fifty percent of marriages end in divorce? Well, I`m guessing it`s because the other fifty percent can`t afford lawyers.
I`ll never fall in love untill and unless love falls on me!
I was at the hospital earlier today and saw a cute girl with a cast on her leg. Naturally, my first thought was "Hey, this one can`t run away..."
"Oh!Look The Smurfs Grew Up!"Grandma those are Avatars." -_-