Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
As an adult, I use nunchucks way less than I expected.
I always take a number at the deli, and I`ve been keeping them.... Eventually I`ll have all the numbers and it will always be my turn.
The best things in life require no pants.
Sometimes I wanna copy someone´s status word for word and see if they notice.
Sometimes when I wave my hands in the air, I actually do care.
Never let a medical procedure scare you. That`s what the bill is for.
Why is it called tourist season if we can`t shoot them?
Hey people who say I am boring and not interesting; FYI the police just called saying they want to talk to me because I am "a person of interest"
May your Labor Day contain no Labor!
Just convinced my Mom she won`t get Wolf of Wall Street if she doesn`t see Teen Wolf first.
I’ve decided to get rid of my bad habits…just as soon as equally satisfying good habits become available.
Applebees is a word that starts off pretty tame but takes a dangerous twist
I`m like the toughest guy in this comic book store.
Whoever invented grass must be a billionaire that stuff is everywhere
Have you ever noticed that half way through the ColonialPenn insurance commercial, Alex Trebek tries to pull a Jedi-Mind-Trick on us.... "This is the insurance you are looking for." (I didn`t get enough sleep last night.)