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"You`ve got a friend in me." - Cannibals, probably
I`m sure the fellow below don`t have big feet :(
Have you ever seen the look on a mans face when he is truly sorry? Yeah, me either!
On a scale of Doopers, you`re pretty Super.
Chaos, panic, & disorder – my work here is done.
Facebook is the best place to say whatever you want. If it doesn’t go over well you can just say you were hacked.
Please don’t take anything I say personal or too seriously. I’m just an idiot with internet access.
I got pulled over for drunk driving last night. In my defense I didn’t even know I was driving.
I bought my mother in-law one of those atomic clocks. I can`t wait for the alarm to go off.
I`m God`s gift to women if he stopped at a gas station last minute.
Fact: Pornos aren`t based on actual events.
Nobody cleans a house faster than a man expecting to get laid.
Have you ever listened to somebody speak and wonder who ties their shoelaces for them?
Please please, keep talking. I always yawn when I`m interested...
My ID expired so I can only go to the liquor store where they remember me: The one where I asked the cashier out and threw up on the floor.