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I`m not a Dr. or a Nutritionist, but I`m pretty sure the worst thing you can put into any high fat/ high calorie dish is your fork.
You know its cold out ......when you go outside..... and it`s cold out
If I had a time machine, I would just keep going back to bed.
I just let my mind wander, but it didn’t come back yet.
Still haven`t answered my life`s calling... I`ve always just assumed it dialed the wrong number.
There`s both a McDonald`s and a blood pressure machine at our Walmart. Circle of life.
"Well that can`t be right." - dogs watching us catching balls with our hands
I consider each one of my friends a gift. Now if only I could remember where I put some of those receipts.
You ever wonder why wearing no underwear is called β€œgoing commando”? It seems to me it wouldn’t be useful in a combat situation.
I need a fixed income. Mine is broken.
Cleaning a house while toddlers are in it is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos.
Letting the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back in.
My facebook has been rated PG for Poor Guy
Sometimes I think hip hop music gets a bad rap.
All these years and I still don`t understand why they didn`t put Kevin Bacon in Grease.