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My kids think I`m uncool like I thought my parents where. Time to get even! ;)
You`re not a geek or a nerd because you always have to have the latest high tech gadgets and electronics. YOU`RE RICH
You make me have filthy thoughts, and for that I thank you...
My wife gives me sound advice. 99% sound. 1% advice.
It`s amazing how important someone can make you feel with a smile, a kind word or the occasional stalking.
My life is a constant cycle of waiting until the weekend and then not doing anything when it comes.
My favorite drinking game is drinking.
8 more days and I will finally get rid of last years Halloween candy.
I was only 6 numbers away from winning the powerball.
Just how hairy was the dude who invented a shampoo called Head & Shoulders?
Life is just like a p@nis: Simple, relaxed and hanging freely, It`s the women who make it hard.
Its awkward touching hands with another man in a popcorn bag, especially if you don`t know the man & he doesn`t know you`re eating his popcorn
never realized how awkward it is to study the reproductive system in a coffee shop.. until now.
I love sleeping, but I never want to go to bed early.
Its so cold out, I actually saw a gangsta with his pants UP!