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I`m at the "what can I make with green beans and cake mix" stage of needing groceries
If you have to ask if it`s too early to drink wine...You`re an amateur and we can`t be friends.
18 is TOO young to get married! You can`t even buy booze at 18! If you can`t buy booze, how the hell are you gonna make a marriage work?!?
My personality is 30% the last movie I watched.
The monent of triumph when your bag is the first off the plane.
Acting like a mature adult is super easy if you hate having fun.
Just saw a commercial for weight gainer pills. Have the people with this "problem" not heard of pizza and alcohol?
Health insurance is rare for exotic dancers. Most strippers have little or no coverage.
You know I feel the frustration that The Skipper endured because there are days that I too am surrounded by Gilligans
Did you know? If you put your finger in your ear and scratch, it sounds like Packman!
We’ve solved so many world problems, and yet chocolate still has calories.
My husband`s wife is freakin` awesome!
Girls here`s an idea, instead of spending all that money on makeup. Just buy your guy a bottle of Jack Daniels.
I’m not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they’d come up sliced.
I saw a sign that said "watch for children" and I thought, "That sounds like a fair trade"