Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Another World`s Oldest Man has died. This is beginning to look suspicious.
If you go shopping at Walmart and no one stares at you as you walk by, you`re one of them.
People who wait 4 hours to reply to my text with "lol" should be shot.
If you see someone crying, ask if it`s because of their haircut.
Big shout-out to slugs! Those little guys are out there everyday, doing all the same stuff as snails but without helmets.
You are the pebble in my shoe of people
My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that.
You know that tingly feeling you get when you have a crush on someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.
I hate it when people like their own statuses * At this point you like your status for dramatic effect*
Sometimes, you wonder what the hell the music video has to do with the song.
I`m kind of like Hugh Hefner. Only without the mansion, the exotic cars, the girls, the magazine and the money. Basically, I`m just a guy in a bathrobe.
My anger management class pisses me off
ooooh boy, Mother`s Day hangovers...always the worst huh?!
You know you`ve reached adulthood when your bed is in the middle of the wall instead of in the corner.
Million dollar idea: A snooze button that lets you sleep longer the harder you hit it.