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So tell me, does it hurt to be so full of sh!t?
My entire life is a “you had to be there” moment.
Modern video games are giving kids unrealistic standards of how many swords they can carry at one time.
How to make a Vodka Christmas cake. . (Made mine this morning!!!!) 1 cup sugar, 1 tsp. baking powder, 1 cup water, 1 tsp. salt , 1 cup brown sugar, Lemon juice, 4 large eggs, Nuts, 1......bottle Vodka, 2 cups dried fruit. Sample a cup of Vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Vodka again to be... sure it is of the highest quality then Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point, it is best to
I used to wonder what it was like to read people’s minds. Then I got a Facebook account and I got over it.
Laughter is the best medicine (that my insurance is willing to cover)
Apparently, I`m the only one that wants to drink beer at this intervention.
Blood moon, shooting stars....I gotta move to a safer galaxy
I can’t find the words to express how I have nothing to say
Think about how much more stressful life’s most stressful moments would be if accompanied by the running-out-of-time music in Mario Bros.
When ur mom Calls and u have a party at ur house you; shut up!! Answers phone you; hi mommy!
People say laughter is the best medicine, but I’d like to think a beer is the way to go.
I only support ghost hunting if you need the ghost for food.
This is the only way I know how to correctly use a semi-colon ;)
80% of my life is pulling percentages out of thin air and stating them as facts...