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They say a woman’s work is never done. Maybe that’s why they get paid less.
You should probably first master the art of thinking “inside” the box
The recipe I am making says to chill for 30 minutes so I`m sitting back and having a margarita!
"You go girl" - asking my girlfriend to move out, but sassy like
Got interrupted downloading the new version of iTunes by a pop up that asked if I wanted to download the even newer version of iTunes.
The person that named the eggplant probably isn’t allowed to name things anymore.
The weekend is just a bittersweet memory.... I won`t cry because it`s over, I`ll smile because for a few miles they believed I was the real bus driver.
Like a stoned man once said, I can`t remember.
I`ll bet Amish people look forward to Thanksgiving since it`s the only time their clothes look festive.
Keep calm and pretend today isn’t Monday.
I started to compliment my neighbors on their new wallpaper but then I realized they can`t hear me through binoculars.
if truth is what u want...in return alcohol is all I want...
I don`t blame Monday. I blame Saturday for not matching my Powerball numbers
Jealous women do better research then the FBI. True story.
Ever wish the choice you made and the “right thing to do” were the same thing?