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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Ladys, if you`re in an argument with a guy and there`s no may to win. Start playing with your boobs...works every time.
Idk what was worse, the fact that my girlfriend text me saying β€œsorry breaking up with you” or that a minute later she text me back β€œsorry wrong number.”
There should be a day in between Saturday and Sunday.
Netflix doesn’t care if u showered or not
Behind every beautiful song is a person who really shouldn`t sing it out loud in public
I miss that feeling you`d get at the video store when you discovered the movie you wanted to rent was available.
In the United States a man gets kicked in the groin every 6.2 seconds. I would hate to be that man.
I prefer to call it a β€œTa-Da” list. Cause it’d be amazing if I actually accomplished anything on it.
Best grilled cheese ever!! All I did was add a hamburger patty.
When you turn 21, you can legally do all the things you`ve been doing since you were 15.
I love asking kids what they want to be when they grow because I`m still looking for ideas
Just shaved my legs for the first time since October...just kidding, it`s not warm enough for that yet.
"That`s close enough..." ~Government worker
I`ll never join one of those dating sites. I prefer to meet someone the old fashioned way. By alcohol & bad decisions.
Watching these gymnasts doing the balance beam is making me feel really bad about almost missing the couch.