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Do you really know me or am I just an idea that you`ve built in your head?
I wonder if Oscar the Grouch has a hipster cousin somewhere that lives in a recycling bin.
Stop screaming, lady. All I said was `this is how pornos start`. It`s just elevator talk.
People need to stop putting flyers on my car. I don`t want to see a band called "Parking Violation" at the "Courthouse."
Ladies: if you argue with your man naked, you will win every single time.
Debate?.....isn`t that what you use to catch "The Fish" ?
The guy who invented the Time Machine has just died.... RIP DAVE JONES 2187-2014
CONGRATULATIONS! You are the 13th woman he`s called "beautiful" on Facebook today.
Whoever decided to color underpants white was an idiot.
Doing some caroling! All by myself. In people`s backyards. In the bushes. Very little singing. Mostly watching.
People always say that alcohol kills... but if you think about it .... it causes many births too.
The good thing about listening to a new song is that it doesn’t remind you of anyone.
I hate spelling errors so much. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined....
I just want you to be happy. And naked.
There should be a mercy rule for how many pics a girl can upload from her vacation.