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It’s annoying when Netflix keeps stopping to buffer. Stupid neighbors just won’t upgrade their WiFi.
Chess says everything about men & women. The King has to take things one step at a time, while the Queen can do whatever the hell she wants.
Unless you discovered a dead body, I don`t want to hear about your morning jog.
Facebook is my serious account, the funny one is my bank account.
Hey, if it doesn`t work out, we can still be friends. Said no guy ever
Nuclear physicists can be lots of fun. They`re often referred to as the half life of any party.
Next time I get a bunch of, "likes," on a comment I post on someones status/photo etc.. Im gonna edit my comment and change the whole comment to, "like this status if you would f*ck your father." Just to make anyone else who reads it from then on think ill about the people who liked it. ™
I don’t always have time to study, but when I do, I don’t.
I`ll bet I`m the only one in this grocery store with "sh!t for tacos" on my shopping list.
If I liked one of your pics from 12 weeks ago, doesn`t mean I`m stalking you...It just means you haven`t looked nice in awhile
I`d like to thank Tetris for making me really good at loading my dishwasher.
It’s the people that DON`T talk to themselves that are the crazy ones. At least that’s what I tell myself.
See, I would run, but it`s usually bodies of joggers that are found dead in the woods.
We`ll be friends `til we`re old and senile ... Then we`ll be new friends.
Wait, whaddya mean... cookie dough can be baked? Seriously?