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Just remember the only thing standing between you and your dreams is your talent
I just took a 5 hour energy and a sleeping pill...LET THE BATTLE BEGIN.
It’s not that I’m old, your music really does suck.
Tomorrow, history will be made. Months and months of advertisements and anticipation has led up to this historic day. America will see firsthand what is surely to be a historic event, and I am proud to say I will do my part and pick up my copy of Halo 4.
I asked my mom for money and she said "Does it look like I am made of money?" I said "Well isn`t that what M.O.M stands for?"
I don’t need a reason to do stupid things, just a venue.
Every have one of those moments where you look at yourself in the mirror and think "Damn if I weren`t me, I`d totally hit that."
Well that’s a wrap on another day where I act like I know what I’m doing
Be nice to nerds. You`ll probably be working for them one day
I don`t know why people freak out and run when they see a spider. They are just gonna climb in your mouth when you are sleeping anyway.
When I see something funny on the internet, I don’t usually laugh. I just blow more air out of my nose than usual.
Dear whoever is playing sweet child o` mine at 2:30 in the night at full blaring volume to disturb the whole neighborhood......NICE!
After watching "Breaking Bad" and the VMAs in the same night, I think I`d rather my kid be a meth dealer than a musician.
I`ve been around the block a few times.....but only because I was too drunk to find my house.
My Son: The marriage vows say "tell death do us part", so we are not married in heaven ? Me: That`s right son, cause if we were still married, we`d be in hell.