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I`m trying to be healthy and grow my own food but I can`t find any Twinkie seeds. :/
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!
I hope the next big trend in music is Talent.
With all the technology these days, you`d think they would come up with an Online Gym where losing weight would be a click away
Why isn’t our beer color coordinated for all holiday occasions, instead of just St. Patricks Day?
I know there are some people we say were dropped on their heads as babies. But there are others that were clearly thrown in the air, hit the ceiling fan, bounced off the wall & fell out the window.
Punctuality is a waste of time since no one is ever there to appreciate it.
Once a month, women go completely crazy for about thirty days..
Jehovah`s witnesses would probably be welcomed into more houses if they brought booze or cookies.
Haircuts are great because I did none of the work but get all of the credit.
My closet is like 15 shirts I plan to fit into again and 1 shirt I wear every day.
I`m starting to think I overuse exclamation points. It ends today. Right now. I`ll never ever use one again. I`m so excited about it. Yes.
I always found it a little counter productive when the teacher would say "Don`t get smart with me!"
You`re right, you didn`t ask that guy for a d!ck pic, but nobody asked for hundreds of pictures of your face either.
Why do people freak out about dolphins getting caugh in tuna nets? What about the tuna?