Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
They say swearing is due to limited vocabulary. I know thousands of words, but I still prefer`f*ck off` to `go away`.
In sign language, arthritis is a speech impediment.
For those of you wondering what it`s like to be married, I`m on day 3 of an argument I didn`t know I was having.
Sleeping is so difficult when you have a world awake in your phone.
Of all the lies I tell, "I was just kidding!" is my favorite.
Why isn`t Hungary`s capital city called "Very"
A true man is one who leaves his wife alone in cold weather and goes to watch football.
Sometimes I order fajitas at a restaurant just to get more attention.
Lord, it`s me... Can you close your eyes for a couple minutes while I deal with a slight problem?
I`m kinda like an onion, not in some deep I have layers way, but if you see me naked, you`ll cry.
What are the strongest days of the week? Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.
Our neighbor said he wouldn`t mind me stealing their newspaper if I would at least put a robe on first.
I haven’t lived paycheck to paycheck since my last paycheck.
Im really not just some idiot with nothing better to do with my time, I just play one in FB.
Friends who buy you food are friends for life.