Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The average person farts 14 times a day. Finally, I`m above average at something!
Bored? Find group photo of 4 women. Comment "You 3 look incredible!!"
there`s a fine line between "cocky" and "confidence"...and it just so happens I have perfect balance!
I grew up living paycheck to paycheck. But through hard work and perseverance, I now live direct deposit to direct deposit.
I couldn`t be on a reality show because I wouldn`t want my mom to see how many times I make the jerk-off motion when we talk on the phone
If a tree falls on your Ex in the woods, and no one hears it, still get rid of the chainsaw just in case.
Is it bad when I’m talking to myself and I’m not even listening?
I have no idea how I use to get around in the dark before I had a cell phone.
Friends are like slinkys, they are twisted as heck but you can`t help but laugh when they fall down the stairs.
Now reached the age where getting lucky is what happens when I can remember where I set my glasses down at
Wonders why we can`t just all get a Long....Island Iced Tea?!?
If you heard twenty minutes of moaning from my bedroom that was just me trying to stand up.
Do you ever get the feeling that you`re being watched? Because if it`s bothering you, I`ll stop.
I felt sorry for the hypnotist I saw last night…he hypnotized 7 guys…then dropped the mic on his foot and yelled F*CK ME ... what happened next will haunt me for the rest of my life
My friend bought some new floral underwear today. I asked her why she bought `floral` underwear to which she replied "its in memory of all the faces that have been buried there".