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I would like to think that I`ll die heroic death saving someone`s life but it`s more likely I`ll trip over my shoelaces and choke on a spoonful of Nutella.
I don`t understand no one has excepted my boiling water challenge
Sometimes I meow back at cats.
If I had to choose between Star Wars and Star Trek, I`d probably choose vodka.
FACEBOOK STORY: Add as friend β Approve -> Write something on wall -Intro β Everyday chatting β Ask number phone β Messaging β Calling β Meeting β Express love β Make relationship status β Hangout β Misunderstanding β Fight β Break up β Unfriend β Block !THE END
I should eat more healthy, but we all saw how that whole apple thing went for Adam & Eve.
You`d think he`d be better at this with all the porn he watches
Another tragedy today in the music industry.....Justin Beiber was just found alive in his apartment. :(
βDonβt make me regret this.β -things I think when accepting a friend request.
If it wasnβt for profanity, I wouldnβt be a pro at anything.
When the nurse calls my name at the doctorβs office, I like to run through the waiting room like I got called on The Price is Right.
So can we just skip to summer now?
Born free. Now, Iβm expensive.
It`s amazing how different the phrases "alcohol free" and "free alcohol" are.
Can I apologize in advance for basically everything I will ever do???