Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I am creating the first ever "flavored windows". They should make some of you very happy.
I miss the life I planned in my head.
Is there another word for synonym?
Tuna are probably pretty annoyed with how much we worry about catching dolphins in our tuna nets.
I’m not stealing my neighbor’s WiFi…their WiFi is trespassing into my house.
My favorite drink is the fullest one on the table.
Perfect has 7 letters and so does meeeeee ....Coincidence? I think not.
My therapist says I should quit talking to myself.
If by self-help you mean helping myself to all the liquor in your cabinet... Then yeah... I`m about as self-helpful as they come.
Dear Toilet Paper Makers, We`ve all unexpectedly run out at some point. Please make the tube in the center softer. Thank you...
I swallowed an ice cube yesterday and I haven`t pooped it out yet ... Really scared now!
Don`t judge a man by how low his pants hang below his a$$...just kidding, that`s a great reason to judge someone.
I met a guy exactly like my father so I brought him home and my mom shot him.
Sometimes I drive between lanes and pretend my car is Pacman gobbling up the dashed lines.
Social Media: Because I like to socialize with cool people without having to speak, wear pants or get off the couch.