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Still waiting for a "Where are they now?" episode about the Flintstones
And we all have that one friend who has more blonde moments than an actual blonde.
Sorry I got mad and said a bunch of things I meant but shouldn`t have said out loud.
I don`t know what I would do without you, but I bet it`s awesome.
According to the U.S. Census Bureau: 190,374 people are having sex right now, 212,130 are kissing, and 1 poor person is reading this post. You hang in there!
To make a long story short quit right in the middle.
I love how music can take you to another place. For example One Direction is playing in this cafe so now I`m going to a different cafe.
I`m not lazy. I`m just highly motivated to not do anything.
I`m opening a bar called The Office. You`re welcome guys. "Be home soon sweetie, I`m at The Office"
The best part about being a pathological liar is flying my helicopter to my private island.
We can put laser-equipped robots on Mars, but wrinkled dollar bills still don’t work in vending machines?
Dear ladies, Not trying to impress you or anything, but I make my own sandwiches.
If we ever travel thousands of light years to a planet inhabited by intelligent life, let’s just make patterns in their crops and leave.
My resume is really just a list of things I never want to do again.
What kind of downward spiral would cause a person to "like" cream cheese on Facebook?