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If you figure me out I want an explanation.
I gotta ask you a sirius question....do you know the muffen man
Taking a nap is so risky. Like, when will I wake up? 30 minutes from now? 2 hours? 12 years? No one can be sure.
Hunting is easier for vegans because it’s easier to sneak up on plants.
If by sexy you mean me licking the donut icing off my fingers then yes I can be damn sexy.
I figured out the chemical composition of Holy Water. It`s H2OMG
If you want your team to win a sporting event just tell me. I will root for the other team. That will guarantee a win for your team.
Screw getting an alarm system. I`ve seen Home Alone, I know what to do.
It`s a good thing Taylor Swift and Adele aren`t dating. Imagine if they broke up.
I hate in video games how penguins always use their ability to slide on their stomachs for evil
The most important part of being on a gluten free diet is telling everyone about it.
My favorite drink is the fullest one on the table.
My bank statement is just a visual record of bad decisions.
The number of things that are *NOT* rocket science is staggering.
Once again its friday I know its only been 7 days since the last one but feels like its been a week....