Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m not bothered if someone likes me or Not. Even Angels are hated by Demons.
great day! laundry done, dishes and house cleaned.... who am I kidding? been drinking since 9 am!!
Perverts can contribute to society. Look at the disturbed individual who discovered cow`s milk.
if you wake up at 3am and scream bloody mary three times in the mirror, your mom will tell you to shut up and go to bed
According to a recent survey, 98% of people responded with "Go away."
Digging through a box in the closet, I found a picture of me sitting on Santa`s lap. Hard to believe that was almost a year ago.
If I could time travel, I`d make sure the guy who made up the word Walkie-Talkie got to name more things.
Police officer: Ma`am do you know why I pulled you over? Me: I`m just as confused as you are.
I was going to get married, but my wife refuses to sign the divorce papers
boss: why are you peeing on the floor? mikeski: i already filled up your coffee cup.
Karma means I can rest easy at night knowing all the people I treated badly had it coming.
These Jehovah`s Witnesses are getting creative. They are now knocking on my door dressed as cops saying they have a warrant.
Pizza doesn’t ask questions. Pizza understands.
That time Homer`s arms were stuck in a vending machine until he realized he could just let go is basically what all of life is like
I don’t think my inner child is ever moving out.