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common sense is like deodrant. the people who need it thr most never use it.
Hard butter is the devil.
Hi, we`re a group of teens who solve mysteries! We wanna be taken seriously so we wrote a theme song about how we can`t ever find our dog.
I don`t know if I`ve got some free time, or if I just forgot what the hell I`m supposed to be doing...
So I met an Egyptian, they walk just like us.
Love is a two way street but you have to be careful because women can’t drive.
I broke my finger today. But on the other hand I`m fine.
I`ve heard that men that are married live longer, but i`ve also heard that men that have sex live longer. Anybody know which one of them is true?
If I drop my food on a plane, and we change time zones at the same time, do I receive an additional hour to the 5 second rule?
"When I grow up, I want to marry a man addicted to video games" ~ No woman ever.
Inventor of camping: "Hey, let`s go pretend to be homeless."
I woke up feeling strange this morning...I felt Rested and Relaxed so I immediately Googled my symptoms. Turns out I had a `Sleep in` Apparently it`s not harmful but may be addictive. . .
If you want to keep a secret from me, write it down and send it to me as a Facebook event invitation.
My New Year`s resolution is to help all my friends gain ten pounds so I look skinnier.
I`m no magician but I can walk down the street and turn into a bar!